I have learned to appreciate my blog for many reasons, but one important reason is the perspective it provides me.
Over the years we have added many developmental and neurological issues to Josiah's laundry list of diagnosis'. This summer we faced yet another that really wore me down. Mental illness in children is tricky; it doesn't present itself the same way as it does in adults. This makes diagnosis a long road. We have yet to get back testing results. I try to be patient, and often slug through my long days, doing everything in my power to make life live-able for all 4 of us. This is a long and lonely road for me at times.
No matter what your circumstance may be though, it is imperative to take a step back and look at your life and what trial you just made it through. Without this important step, you can never learn, and appreciate that you made it. I mean, We Made It! We survived this long and sometimes hellish summer! I needed to see that I kicked ass this summer. We watched our son fall into a deep, dark pit, and I reached down there and pulled him up. I sought help from many different organizations and through our insurance. We had to put him in 2 different facilities to stabilize him mentally and physically. It was the hardest thing I have done as a parent (and don't ever wish to do that again!). Honestly, it just sucked for all four us. Jonny worked hard this summer to get us stabilized financially, I worked hard to find and get support for our family, and Jacob struggled emotionally because of what he has suffered, plus he had a long and lonely summer!
Yesterday, I sat in a room full of Josiah's support system. Our monthly team meeting at Josiah's special school. There was me, Josiah's therapist at school, a special skills trainer, Josiah's personal therapist, a psychiatrist, and our county Care Coordinator. There was so much to discuss and make sure we are all on the same page. One thing that each of them did though, in their own way, was to praise me for all that I do. As I explained certain difficult situations that we need help with, each of them took turns to point out all that things that we did right, or are doing right. I can't tell you how much I needed to hear that from all those professionals.
Todays perspective: 3 months ago we were in the middle of downward spiral that was so scary, it literally freaked me out! Today I sit here with a peacefulness that I never thought would be possible. I know that we have the right people on our team, and Josiah is getting the help he dearly needs. Sure, its still going to be a long road and we have quite a ways to go, but wow, We Made It!
